The Kids Will Be All Right

I’ve said it before and I’m going to say it again: I can always count on Rich Young, the Clyde to my Bonnie, to bestow upon me a gem of truth and knowledge. He has got to be one of the smartest people I know. Let me bless ya’ll with this real quick as I have been so blessed…

“That’s the thing about a sequel, I don’t subscribe to them because they are never as good as the original”

Genius, right?!? Like pure, unfiltered, straight up and down genius. I thought about this hours after my conversation with Rich ended and it just makes so much sense.

I have found that at many moments in my life I have been tricked back into loving someone that I once loved before. And each time I find that things fall apart faster than they did to begin with.

 I anxiously purchase my $12 ticket to see the anticipated Part II even though the previews didn’t look that great and the critics all bashed the plot and the cast. The initial reconnect is always amazing as I am brought back to a place where my memories reside. I am overcome with the same elation and excitement that I felt with the first date, the first kiss, and the first touch. I wrap myself in sweet sweet memories and my mind is fucked into believing that I can recreate these precious moments that I hold so close to my heart. But it never ends up working that way as reality begins to set in and I remove the rose colored glasses and see what is really in front of me. It’s almost like I am holding onto sand. My grip is so tight that my joints begin to ache but no matter how hard I try it just slips through my fingers anyway. Desperate attempts to relive a time in my life when I was happy and when I felt like I was in love and when I felt like I was being loved back. But that’s never what part deux really is. It’s always a mind trick by a man that knows how to manipulate my emotions and knows how to trick me into bed and knows how to maintain me and how to pretend to love me. Is it my fault for being stupid and for allowing myself to be vulnerable? Is it my fault for purchasing the ticket to “Chacha’s Failed Love Life” II in 3D? Maybe. Maybe not. But I do know that history has proven the sequel is never ever EVER as good as the original. Sometimes it might just be better to reminisce in the past for a few good moments out of your day and then move forward with life. Progress ya'll. Just keep that in mind and proceed with caution and the kids should be all right.

XOXO,

CHACHA

Welcome to 2012!

Welcome to 2012 boys and girls!

It’s a brand new year and, as always, this is going to be everyone’s BEST YEAR EVER! Isn’t it funny how every single person on earth always gears up for the rise of a new beginning super amped because the year that is coming to a close that was once supposed to be the “best year ever” turned out to be not so best? Well, I’m honestly convinced that this year really is going to be the best year ever. The final days of 2011 were the ultimate set up for greatness. New job, a blossoming business, national media recognition, and a few awesome interactions with friends, conversations, occurrences that led me to plant the seeds for the cornerstones that this year/the rest of my life will be founded upon.

And I now present to you 11 things that I learned in 2011.

1.   Peace of mind comes with managing your expectations. I can always count on Rich Young to give me what I need. Managing your expectations…that’s a powerful phrase. Don’t expect a cow to bark or a dog to moo. Don’t expect Tyrone to take you to brunch at the Ivy because he won’t. And it’s unfair for you to be mad when you are sitting in the back seat of his 92 Camaro with a 2 piece and a biscuit. And a soda if you’re lucky.

2.   Accountability is key. Take responsibility for your actions. Take responsibility for your personal successes in addition to your let downs. Playing the victim ain’t never been cute. If you want something to happen…handle that ish!

3.   Blessed are the flexible for they never get bent out of shape. When things go wrong just woo-sah, refresh, and regroup. There’s no sense in crying over spilt milk. Clean that shit up and pour yourself some lemonade instead.

4.   A. If you don’t have friends that you can make money with then your life is an ultimate #fail. Surround yourself with greatness and you will be great. Don’t be afraid to discuss your ideas or feed off of each other’s creative energy. #Getmoneybitch

B. Scared money don’t make no money. The craziest most randomest (yes, I am aware that this isn’t a word, however, this IS my blog which means that I can do what I want *hmph*) ideas can prove to be quite profitable.

5.   Your first mind is your right mind. Never second guess yourself. Think long, think wrong. 99% of the time your initial reaction is what you should go with. Unless your first thought is that taking your top off while on spring break in Miami for random men with cameras will land you a role in the next Twilight movie…because it likely won’t.

6.   Take the time to enjoy life and acknowledge your blessings. We have soooooooo many years of worrying about BS ahead of us. Sometimes you really do need to just stop and smell the roses. Life is short. Love hard. Live BOLD.

7.   Love never dies willingly…it is assassinated. An entire post will be dedicated to expounding upon this thought in the very near future. Tune in.

8.   Don’t spend time or energy investing in someone that is not spending time or energy investing in you.

9.   It is dangerous to settle for temporary emotional fulfillment when it is clear that a relationship isn’t going anywhere. Date with integrity. (This was retweeted into my twitter timeline and I thought it to be pretty amazing. I should have just taken the credit for it…)

10. Though we understand and appreciate the brilliance of #9, we must also consider that not every man is going to be your future husband. Enjoy yourself and live your life.

11. Don’t make something hard that doesn’t have to be. Work smarter and not harder.

Happy #2012 ya’ll! Make this the BEST YEAR EVER!

XOXO,

ChaCha

You da One

As much as I cannot stand this girl, I really can't deny that she has an amazing team behind her that makes her everything that she is. I'm not even gonna try to front because she puts out bangers with great visuals to accompany them. Damn girl, you did it again.

Christmas Time is Here!!

It's Christmas time bitches. Here's my Christmas list ya'll. If you are willing to buy me anything listed below you might could get it...and I'm for serious.

All I really want to do with this is ask Siri where I can get a good man at. She seems to have the answers to everything else so maybe it's worth the investment. Def less embarrassing than a profile on e-harmony.

Thousand dollar sling backs with googly eyes glued all over them?!?! Um #duh, I'll take two please!

Black Panther sunglasses though? Tisci, you little devil! Must.Have.

How amaze is this gorgeous LV bag for Resort? It would be perfect for the imaginary vacation to Cabo that I'm going on for Holiday!

Shameless self promo plug here as I am the co-owner of No 9 Candle Co. They are dope though, right? Yeah, I thought so. 100% soy wax n' shit. Like us on FB if you dare.

This is simply beautiful. For Christmas I would love nothing more than for my living area to be transformed into this. Lucite coffee table?? Love.

And if this awkwardly attractive and talented young gent would propose to me on Christmas day I do believe that all my dreams would be catapulted into reality. Well, that accompanied by world peace...And a puppy for every person on earth. That's all I really want for Christmas. Too much to ask? #kanyeshrug

XOXO,

Chacha

Young, Wild, & Free...

I must say that I spend quite a significant amount of time wondering what that phrase really means. What is it to be 'young, wild, and free'? Is it bad choices? Is it reckless decisions? Is it destructive drug addiction and irresponsible consumption of alcohol? Is it fun? Is it love? Is it daisy dukes and a ripped t-shirt? Is it no strings attached? Is it random strangers? Is it tobacco and Mary Jane? Is it passion? Is it music? What does it really mean?

I feel as if though I try to live my life honestly, when it comes down to it my entire existence is a lie. I do things I don't want to do for people that I don't even like. I smile when I don't want to, I laugh at jokes that aren't funny, I flirt with men who repulse me, and I pretend that all of this is fine. I over think every thing, I allow past tense lovers to become synonymous with my present, I conform to the ridiculous expectations of society, and I so obediently do what I am told. My heart is not mine and neither is my mind. Though I make the claim that I am 100% genuinely me "all day, erry day" I don't think that's ever been the case. I don't think I've ever known what it is to be "me". If you asked me who I am I wouldn't be able to tell you. Instead I'd volunteer the "me" that I am perceived to be by the millions of people that experience "me" on a daily basis though none of them have ever lived in this skin.

I want to get to that moment when you surrender yourself to the universe and allow yourself to just be. When I grow up all I wish is to be able to be Young, Wild, and Free...

XOXO,

Chacha

He Loves Me...He Loves Me Not...

Let's get deep for a moment and talk about relationships.

I am so baffled by the way in which this modern generation conducts themselves when it comes to matters of the heart. What Drake so emo-liciously says seems to ring so true as I have come to find that "we live in a generation of not being in love and not being together. But we sure make it feel like we're together because we're so scared to see each other with somebody else..." #deep, right? I'm so there right now. The inconsistency, the drama, the bullshit. It's like we do just enough to keep the other person in the (often title lacking, casual seeming, we're together but we're not actually together type) relationship hanging on, but we're never willing to satisfy them 100% or give them 100% of us. This generation half asses everything! Technology has ruined us. We lack the capability to build meaningful relationships. This absolutely sucks.

What has happened to LOVE? Real, true, gut wrenchingly painful yet absolutely amazing LOVE?? All I'm asking for is someone that I'm crazy about and someone who is crazy about me. When I was young I had a long lists of "must haves" that I expected of my perfect guy (handsome, tall, millions of dollars, no kids, properties in LA, NY, and Paris, a jet, astounding amounts of charm and wit...too much?)but now I find that I'm just a girl looking for a boy to LOVE and to LOVE me back.

And now snapping back to reality, I find myself newly single and on a roller coaster of emotion with an inconsistent lover who knows exactly how to give me enough...when we both know that it's never enough #lesigh. One day this will all make sense. I'll drink to that.

XOXO,

ChaCha

SICK WIT DA SPARKLES...

The Holiday season is upon is. This means tons and tons of sparkly shit...EVRYWHERE!! Paying homage...